Why "body count" is problematic
In the context of dating, it can happen that someone is asked about their own "Body Count." The term refers to the number of sexual partners - and is not without issues. Why, explains psychologist and relationship expert Stella Schultner.
What is the "Body Count"?
Stella Schultner: "Body Count" originated originally in the military context, where it referred to the number of enemies killed. Today, it is mainly known from social media and the online dating community and refers to the number of sexual partners of a person.
For example: If someone says they have a "Body Count" of eight, they have had sex with eight people. It is only about the number of people with whom one has shared intimacy. This "value" plays a role mainly for young people who sometimes want to profile themselves with their sexual experience. Older generations are rather less familiar with it or see it as an inappropriate topic.
What role does a (high) "Body Count" play?
For some people, the "Body Count" plays a role in partner selection. A high "Body Count" can be off-putting for some people, as they fear that the person cannot enter into long-term relationships or is not faithful. People in steady relationships tend to have more sex more frequently than those who frequently change partners.
The "Body Count" says nothing about the relationship skills of a person. There is no fixed limit as to which "Body Count" is "too high" or "okay." Every person has different attitudes and preferences regarding sexuality - and should decide for themselves what "value" is acceptable for them. What is totally normal for one person can be inappropriate for another.
What makes the term problematic?
There are still societal prejudices and double standards regarding sexuality and gender that lead to the discussion of the "Body Count" being different for women and men. Women often fear being negatively judged based on their sexual experiences, while men can usually boast about their experiences.
This discussion can be problematic because it is based on outdated gender stereotypes and moral judgments. The term can also create a distance to one's own intimacy and reduce people to objects. It is legitimate to keep a list to reflect experiences, but not to use it as a means of showing off. Everyone is free to make their own experiences - regardless of gender.
The term 'Sexuality' is deeply intertwined with the discussion surrounding 'Body Count', as it influences people's attitudes and preferences towards intimate relationships.
The concept of 'Sexism' sometimes surfaces in the context of 'Body Count', as societal prejudices lead to different expectations and judgments based on gender.
In the international 'Dating' scene, the topic of 'Sex' and 'Body Count' can vary significantly, revealing diverse cultural norms and attitudes towards sexuality.
