When sex becomes an instrument of power
In many so-called sects, sex plays a significant role in various ways. Some are very free-spirited, others very restrictive. But behind it all is the same thing: It's about power and control.
NXIVM - behind this letter combination (pronounced: "Nexium") hides the most famous "sex sect" of the past few years. Women were held as slaves in this alleged self-help group founded by Keith Raniere, coerced into sex and abused. The case became known when the New York Times revealed the schemes in 2017. According to the report, women were lured into a secret sorority named "Dominus Obsequious Sororium" (DOS) - that is, "Master over obedient women." DOS members were required to provide compromising information, which was used as leverage against them, and were sexually exploited. Raniere was subsequently sentenced to 120 years in prison.
Tragically, the NXIVM case is just one of many examples of how sex plays a prominent role in problematic (religious) groups, or sects. And it does so in two opposing directions: Either everything revolves around sex, or it is an absolute taboo topic that is heavily regulated. In both cases, it's about the same thing: power and control.
Who with whom - the guru decides
Sex is a very intimate topic for many people - and sexuality is a powerful, human fundamental need. Accordingly, it is powerful when it is strongly controlled. Even in groups that claim to represent a free sexual morality, sexuality is a powerful tool for control. Leaders of such groups (they are indeed mostly men) often claim the exclusive right to have sexual relationships with certain members. This creates a special emotional bond, a feeling of exclusivity and dependence.
An example of this from the past is David Koresh and the Branch Davidians he founded. Koresh claimed that sexual relationships with him (including with underage girls) were "divinely ordained" - only he had the power to decide who could sleep with him. The same was true in the crude mindset of the Manson Family: Manson alone decided who could have intimate relationships with whom, securing the loyalty and bonding of his followers.
But the topic is also current in Germany: There are numerous critical reports about the Hinduist group "Bhakti Marga" active in Germany, which accuse their guru Vishwananda of sexual exploitation of members. Legal judgments are still pending.
Officially, of course, it goes without saying that in such groups it's not about such mundane things as physical gratification. The necessity of sleeping with the guru is presented differently: Sexual ecstasy has an enlightenment function. Sexuality is considered a means to reach higher levels of consciousness. That was also the case with the aforementioned group NXIVM: Keith Raniere manipulated women by claiming that sexual relationships with him would further their spiritual development.
Through sexual control, emotional and psychological dependencies are formed. Members develop a strong need for recognition and affection from the leadership figure, which further strengthens their control. This is particularly evident in the supposedly sexually free group "Children of God," which had its peak in the 1980s and 1990s of the 20th century. Their leader David Berg, for example, used sexual relationships to create emotional bonds. And not only for himself personally, but also in the mission: Berg promoted the practice of "Flirty Fishing," in which female members were supposed to use sexual relationships to win new members and bind existing ones.
When Sex is Taboo
And then there are the groups where Sex is not a topic - and paradoxically, it is precisely because of this that it is prominently present. Even in the context of stricter Christian faith communities, the so-called "Purity Culture" is present in many shades and facets. Under "Purity Culture," one understands the atmosphere that emphasizes sexual chastity before marriage and a strict morality regarding gender roles and sexual behavior. Sex - and even physical closeness itself - is therefore taboo. And at the same time, so many efforts are made to prevent perceived sexual misconduct that it becomes a nearly omnipresent topic.
Behind this lies the idea of purity. The teachings of "Purity Culture" often emphasize the idea that sexual purity is not just a physical condition but is also closely linked to moral and spiritual purity. This creates an environment in which young people and young adults are constantly questioning and evaluating their thoughts and actions regarding sexuality. Their self-image is also affected, as it is repeatedly conveyed: A person - especially a woman - is valuable if they preserve their supposed "purity" until marriage.
As a result, people who grow up with this mindset often develop a difficult relationship with their own sexuality and their body. Not infrequently, they are also unable to enjoy or live out their sexuality as adults according to their own desires. Embedded shame and guilt feelings from childhood can affect them for decades.
Sex - a matter of identity
But why are there such varying expressions of this? Why does the theme of sexuality play such an important role in problematic (religious) groups, so-called cults? A significant factor is certainly that one's own sexuality and how it is lived out has a lot to do with one's own identity. And this is much more than many other areas of life: Of course, questions like what a person eats or what attracts them are identity-forming. But the theme of sexuality is also often shameful and much more intimate - and sexual preferences and desires cannot be put on or taken off like a pair of sneakers.
Sexuality is therefore a powerful tool to exert control over people. If there are clear ethical rules regarding this topic in a doctrine, it is about more than just physical closeness or physical chastity. The question of sexuality becomes a question of one's own identity. And so, sex creates deep emotional bonds between people, which can lead to strong dependencies.
And so it is no coincidence that sexuality plays a significant role in many so-called sects - in whatever form it may be. Whether restrictive or free-spirited, similar mechanisms lie beneath the surface. A perceived freedom may in fact only be apparent from the outside - in reality, it often hides a system of pressure and control.
In light of the discussions about sexual abuse within NXIVM, it's important to consider the international context of religious groups and their handling of sexuality. Sadly, cases of sexual abuse are not uncommon in these communities, as demonstrated by the allegations against the Hinduist group "Bhakti Marga" in Germany.
Religious or sectarian groups often use sexual control as a tool to establish emotional and psychological dependencies within their members. This is not a new phenomenon, as evidenced by cases such as David Koresh and the Branch Davidians, or even more recently, Keith Raniere and NXIVM.
In groups that consider sexuality a means to enlightenment, leaders often claim the exclusive right to sexual relationships with certain members, creating feelings of exclusivity and dependence. However, in other groups where sex is taboo, the topic becomes even more prominent due to the strict regulation, leading to internal struggles and potential long-term effects on members' self-image and relationships with their sexuality.
