As German society becomes more lax with regards to dishonesty.
According to a survey conducted by dating app Parship and market research institute Innofact, Germans have become more tolerant towards infidelity. In a survey from early 2018, 97% considered a long-term affair as cheating, but this number decreased to 85% in May of this year. The perception of one-night stands also shifted, from 96% to 82%. Visiting a brothel, which was considered cheating by 91% six years ago, is now only seen as such by 67% of Germans.
Germans are also more relaxed about kissing outside of a relationship. While 81% considered it cheating in 2018, this number has dropped to 57% in 2024. However, women tend to be stricter about this than men: 64% of women consider kissing as cheating, compared to 49% of men.
Extramarital dating sites also see a decrease in the perception of cheating. Six years ago, 87% considered signing up for dating apps as cheating, but now only 63% do. Men are more laid-back about this, with 55% not considering it cheating.
Eric Hegman, Parship's study coordinator and single coach, attributes this change in attitude to a differentiation between emotional and physical fidelity. The question of fidelity, he says, is about security: "Am I your priority? Can I rely on you? Will you sacrifice anything that could threaten our relationship?" Couples who negotiate their needs based on these principles often agree that physical experiences in external relationships won't necessarily threaten the emotional connection.
Interestingly, the survey results show that younger generations can be stricter in some aspects. For example, 75% of 18-29 year-olds consider signing up on a dating app to arrange secret meetings as cheating, compared to 54% of 60-69 year-olds. While secret meetings without sexual contact is considered cheating by 53% of all respondents, 64% of Generation Z consider it cheating, compared to 38% of those aged 60-69.
The online survey was conducted in May 2024 with 1008 German respondents aged 18-69. The results were compared with a representative study from January 2018 with 1025 respondents.
In light of the shifting attitudes towards infidelity, one may argue that love, life, and family dynamics in Germany have become more complex. As the survey reveals, the perception of actions like visiting a brothel or signing up for extramarital dating sites has significantly decreased, indicating a more relaxed view on monogamy within relationships.
